Hi Charlotte,
The next time we talk you must tell me how you found out about me
and my dress. I still can’t believe it’s going to be in your show. You’ve made
me the darling of both my book club and the group I curl with. Anyway … here’s
the story you wanted.
My husband, as I told you, is an architect. But since talking to
you, I realize that the problem I had with our relationship wasn’t because Ted
is an architect; it was because he was, in his own mind, an unsuccessful one. I
believe his drive, his endless working and his sacrifice of time with me and
our kids was to earn praise that he hoped would bring him self-respect. But it
never happened.
I couldn’t talk to Ted about his work and what it was doing to our
family. He’d get very defensive and shut me out. Soon I realized that our
marriage problems were becoming a life problem for me so I knew I had to act.
Everything my friends seemed so confrontational. That’s just not my
style. Besides, when I parsed my feelings I realized that although I was
unhappy and could not go on with Ted and the family the way we were, I still
loved him. So instead of bitching at him, I decided to try to help him feel some
pride.
Ted loved his launch parties. All the partners in his firm had them.
They’d happen when permits for a project were in hand and the model was built.
They’d have an unveiling of the model in their offices or at the client’s
offices and it was always a really big deal for Ted.
At the time, he had a car dealership that sold really fancy and expensive
cars in development. I decided that the launch party for the dealership was the
ideal place for me to execute my plan. But I didn’t know what the plan would
be.
When I was waiting to get my hair done I saw an article about some
outrageous fashion designs that artists had made, and one dress really struck
me because it was so architectural. And I thought what a great idea for the
wife of an architect.
My daughters helped me fold all the paper. We built it at my
sister’s. I’ve enclosed pictures we took of it when it was finished.
My dress was the hit of the party and the company told Ted he could
do their next new dealership so they could see what kind of dress I’d wear to
that opening. Ted was over the moon. We
had a great talk on the way home. He heard me; he got it. Things were much
better after that and I totally credit the dress.
Cheers,
Charlotte,
Devon.
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